Skylark Somatic Therapy

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Branchburg, NJ
Skylark Somatic Therapy

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Helping high-achieving women heal from anxiety, complex trauma, and relational wounds through somatic and relationally-focused therapy.

Serving NJ in-person & online. We partner with organizational leaders to provide employees with practical and sustainable mental health training and holistic wellness programs that are engaging, effective, and flexible. Our Solutions:
•Training & Advising
•Leadership Coaching
•Psychotherapy & Counselling

10/28/2026

Sometimes we finally share something difficult and then spend the evening wishing we could take the words back.

The relief we hoped for may be mixed with vulnerability, uncertainty, or shame.

You don't have to judge yourself for that response. You can slow down and notice what you need now.

If it happened in therapy, you can bring that experience into the next session: “I felt exposed after we talked. I think I need a slower pace.”

That is meaningful information. Your comfort, your choices, and your ability to stay connected to yourself belong in the work.

Read more: https://skylarksomatictherapy.com/self-silencing-relational-trauma/ 🌿

10/27/2026

“That's just how your mother is.”

Sometimes an explanation ends the conversation before your experience is heard.

You may understand why a parent behaved as they did. You may feel compassion for their history. And something they did may still have hurt you.

When a family has little room for that complexity, staying quiet can feel like the safest way to remain connected.

Acknowledging your experience doesn't require confrontation. It can begin privately, in writing, in therapy, or with someone who can listen without asking you to make it smaller.

More in my September blog: https://skylarksomatictherapy.com/self-silencing-relational-trauma/ 🌿

10/26/2026

Maybe you learned how quickly the atmosphere could change when you said what you really felt.

A facial expression shifted.

Someone became defensive.

The conversation ended.

You were told you were too sensitive, ungrateful, or making too much of something.

Eventually, you may have stopped waiting for the reaction. You learned to soften your words, dismiss your hurt, or say that everything was fine before anyone asked.

This can help preserve connection. It can also leave us feeling as though only the most manageable parts of us have room within our relationships.

Healing doesn’t mean forcing yourself to say everything you’ve kept inside. It may begin more quietly—with noticing what you feel before turning toward someone else’s response.

My latest blog explores self-silencing, belonging, and what it can mean to make room for more of ourselves.

https://skylarksomatictherapy.com/self-silencing-relational-trauma/

10/21/2026

Sometimes, loneliness is hard to explain—especially when you aren’t actually alone.

You have people who care. You might even feel deeply loved. But it’s hard to imagine what would happen if they knew how unhappy you really feel, how much something still hurts, or how tired you are from always being the one holding everything together.

Feeling lonely doesn’t mean your relationships don’t matter. It might mean a part of you needs more space to be seen and heard—either within those relationships or somewhere else that feels safe.

This month’s blog explores that quiet space between being loved and feeling truly known.
https://skylarksomatictherapy.com/self-silencing-relational-trauma/ 🌿

10/20/2026

Have you ever finished writing a message and realized that you've apologized three times for having a need?

Sometimes we're trying to be considerate. Sometimes we're also trying to make sure the other person won't pull away, become angry, or think differently of us.

The habit can become so familiar that we barely notice the work it takes.

You might pause before sending and privately ask: “What did I want to say before I started managing how it might be received?”

You still get to choose your words, your timing, and whether you want to have this conversation.

More in my September blog: 🌿
https://skylarksomatictherapy.com/self-silencing-relational-trauma/

10/15/2026

Sometimes the person who seems to need the least is carrying more than anyone realizes.

You may be the one who checks in, makes the plans, and notices when someone else is struggling. But when it's your turn to answer “How are you?” you find yourself saying, “I'm fine.”

Perhaps there isn't an easy answer. Perhaps you don't want to worry anyone. Or perhaps you've learned that your relationships go more smoothly when you don't need very much.

There can be loneliness in being appreciated for your strength while feeling unsure whether there's room for your struggle.

My September article explores why we silence parts of ourselves, what those patterns protect, and how we can begin making room for more of who we are.

Read it here: https://skylarksomatictherapy.com/self-silencing-relational-trauma/ 🌿

09/01/2026

Sometimes “I'm fine” means something closer to:
I'm still functioning.

We're getting up. Going to work. Caring for our families.

Answering messages. Solving problems. Doing what needs to be done.

Nothing is falling apart.

And that can make it surprisingly difficult to recognize when we're struggling.

When chronic stress has become familiar, we may stop noticing the quieter signs that we're reaching our limits: irritability, tension, exhaustion, emotional disconnection, difficulty relaxing, or feeling overwhelmed by things we would normally manage with ease.

We may simply keep pushing.

For people accustomed to being capable and dependable, functioning can become the standard we use to determine whether we're okay.

But our bodies may be telling a different story.

Healing can include learning to notice those signals earlier—before exhaustion or overwhelm becomes the only thing strong enough to get our attention.

Not because we need to become less capable.

Because taking care of ourselves shouldn't require reaching a breaking point first.

I explore this and other hidden experiences of high-functioning anxiety in The Hidden Cost of Being High-Functioning.

https://skylarksomatictherapy.com/high-functioning-anxiety-relational-trauma/

08/31/2026

Some people are remarkably comfortable being the person others rely on—and surprisingly uncomfortable when they have to rely on someone else.

Giving feels natural.

Receiving can bring guilt, discomfort, indebtedness, or the urge to quickly regain our independence.

For people shaped by relational trauma, this pattern can have deep roots. When asking for help, expressing a need, or depending on someone wasn't consistently met with care, learning to need less could become a way of protecting ourselves.

Years later, that protection may look like competence, independence, or being the person who always has everything handled.

But relationships aren't sustained by what we can provide for one another alone.

Connection asks us to receive, too—to allow ourselves to be helped, comforted, supported, and cared for without immediately needing to earn it back.

Healing doesn't mean becoming less independent. It can mean discovering that needing other people doesn't have to cost us our sense of safety or our sense of self.

I explore this in greater depth in The Hidden Cost of Being High-Functioning.

https://skylarksomatictherapy.com/high-functioning-anxiety-relational-trauma/

08/26/2026

Healing doesn't necessarily mean the old patterns disappear.

You may still get overwhelmed.

You may still overfunction when life becomes uncertain.

You may still slip into perfectionism or find yourself trying to control an outcome you can't control.

But maybe you notice sooner.

You recover more quickly.

You recognize when you're reaching your limits.

You ask for help.

You trust what your body is telling you.

And when an old pattern returns, you're increasingly able to meet it with curiosity rather than treating it as evidence that you've somehow failed.

Healing isn't about becoming less thoughtful, responsible, or capable.

It's about having more choice in how you live—and discovering that safety, connection, and worth don't have to be earned.

I explore this in the final section of my latest article:
The Hidden Cost of Being High-Functioning
https://skylarksomatictherapy.com/high-functioning-anxiety-relational-trauma/

08/20/2026

One of the more confusing effects of relational trauma is that emotionally healthy people don't always feel immediately comfortable.

Consistency can feel unfamiliar.

Kindness can make us wonder what someone really wants.

Calm can feel like the quiet before something goes wrong.

At other times, we may feel intensely drawn toward relationships that recreate emotional dynamics our nervous system already recognizes.

What we experience as chemistry isn't always compatibility.
Sometimes it's familiarity.

Understanding this isn't about distrusting attraction or analyzing every relationship. It's about becoming curious about what our nervous system has learned to associate with connection.

I explore this relationship between familiarity, safety, high-functioning anxiety, and relational trauma in my latest article:

The Hidden Cost of Being High-Functioning
https://skylarksomatictherapy.com/high-functioning-anxiety-relational-trauma/

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Branchburg, NJ

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https://www.skylarksomatictherapy.com/

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