Moon Blossom Healing

Moon Blossom Healing Studying for yoga certification and health and spiritual coaching.

It seems obvious to me now but as an empath I have always believed that I was experiencing the feelings of others. That ...

It seems obvious to me now but as an empath I have always believed that I was experiencing the feelings of others. That is not the case. Instead as I am qued through my senses to observe the emotions or physical sensations ( such as massage) my own preceptions, life experiences, and understanding of what I am observing is different from what the other person is experiencing. So I'm not experiencing their pain. I am still experiencing my own pain in response to those ques. So while even as we have shared consciousness we are only able to experience it as an individual.

Invitation to read my blog post on my website

Invitation to read my blog post on my website

I have been through a dark night of the soul. As this was a deeply painful and personal experience I do not feel comfortable discussing the details. However I would like to discuss the results. My original preception of coaching has changed due to education and life experience. My original vision ha...

Just finished this practice and WOW I learned so much. Also I used blocks to walk up to forward fold. world of differenc...

Just finished this practice and WOW I learned so much. Also I used blocks to walk up to forward fold. world of difference. I did it ! This lady has a massive channel so I will never run out.

Yoga for Beginners: Full 60-Min Free Yoga Class. This class is for Complete Beginners (yes, truly yoga for beginners, it can be your first yoga class ever!) ...

An Idea popped into my head maybe I should write a book about my health journey/path as I go. Even if it's just for me. ...

An Idea popped into my head maybe I should write a book about my health journey/path as I go. Even if it's just for me. Weight loss, flexibility, mobility, strength, mind body connection, food, spiritual, habits and mindset.

I just complete a free webinar yoga class I got from Brett Larkin with Uplifed Yoga. It was a free-form feminine yoga pr...

I just complete a free webinar yoga class I got from Brett Larkin with Uplifed Yoga. It was a free-form feminine yoga practice. I struggled during the beginning to stay still in the meditation which was longer then I expected it to be. I felt impatient to get moving so I know that's something I need to work on. Also during the session I let my hair down which was absolutely amazing to feel and move with it free. I felt moments of deep connection to the Goddess and myself but I struggled as well to surrender to the movement. Being as "Surrender" has come up multiple times over the last week and a half it's pretty clear now what that means. Again I am unused to using feminine energy during exercise and it made me feel pretty vulnerable but also empowered. I would love to get a membership at Uplifted Yoga but it's to much money however it's on my someday list because I really want to explore this approach to yoga.

I would have to say that the majority of exercise I have experienced was masculine even if feminine concept were are par...

I would have to say that the majority of exercise I have experienced was masculine even if feminine concept were are part of it my own approach was often masculine. Strong, technical, logical, protective. Today after a ta***ic focused on feminine energy yoga my mind just clicked. I had been trying to access the feminine in a masculine way. However I have been using yoga and dance to explore several different movements to increase my mobility and range of motion. This has really helped me imencily in connecting to my body, my approach, thoughts and feelings about exercise but it has also opened my eyes to how to connect to my feminine and masculine energies. I feel so centered and whole.


I am making this post to express letting go of old habits and a hope that someone can learn from my experience which many of these habits are common in exercise in general and some specific to martial arts in particular. Its going to be long. So I am going to talk about exercise mistakes I made as a martial artist in my youth that had long term effects on my life. Let me prefix this by saying I do not blame the three Primary Instructors that taught me, I have the utmost respect for them. However some of the attitudes and perspectives cultivated by their example or direct instruction did impact me in a negative way. I fully understand that they may not have been aware or have their own human experience, learning and or human limitations that I as a younger person did not preceive at the time due to the elevated status they had in my eyes.
1. Not breathing properly while training. I was not really instructed on how to properly breath during movement. With exception of being taught to exhale when contact was made in my gut or when I made contact with a strike. When not sparring I had the horrible habit of holding my breath especially with high effort movements. It a bad habit I continued to hold into in my future exercise efforts. As instructors were often teaching a class with a lot of people it's completely understandable that this habit was not noticed or corrected.
2. Over exercising. This came from several preceptions about being a martial artist and my own need to be "strong". It also came from my personal desire to improve my abilities and the belief that I was inadequate as a martial artist by comparing my progress to others. It was not uncommon for me to exercise and train 13 hours in a day with a 5 mile run as "warm up". Then because of insomnia working out at night too. I refused to rest even as I struggled because I believed in no pain no gain. And because of this mentality not only did my skills deteriorate, but I became burned out which lead to me giving up martial arts completely. I also had several minor injuries that took longer to heal and caused me continuous pain in my body. Which leads me to #3
3. Working out regardless of injury and pain. Unfortunately this did come from 2 of my instructors as both had serious injuries that they continued to push through leading to both of them becoming debilitated for life. Two more present Injuries I sustained stayed with me and still effect me to this day. One is a slipped disc in my lumbar spine, the other was a whiplash injury that moved my skull out of alignment with my cervical spine as seen in an ex ray and was a likely contributing factor in the 20+ years I suffered with migraine.
4. Not learning to work with the change in my body after puberty. I started before puberty but a few years in my body dramatically changed with a large bust and hip change. Now all of my instructors were male. Most of my fellow martial artist were also male. The only female that acted in a guide in my training was a small Asian female that did not have larger hips or bust. So really this came from a place where no one was actually available to teach me how to adjust for my new center of gravity and shape. I did do the best that I could but saw changes in my balance, my abilities and weight.
5. Obsessing about weight. I developed the habit of starving myself trying to get down to the fly weight fighting category because there were only two categories at the time. Fly and heavy. This was because there were so few females available to spar with in competition. I was at the bottom of heavy weight and often competed against girls far larger then me. During Nationals I fought with a girl that was over 100lbs larger. She also kicked me in the back using that weight in a power kick that missed my core. This caused the back injury I still have. I am not the only woman that had injury due to size differences. One of the competitors I fought had a conversation with me about having had several ribs crushed during a previous fight that punctured her lung and took nearly a year to recover from. * seriously shout out to her for having the guts to get back into the ring.*
My weight obsession also led me to struggle with self esteem, over exercising, working out through injury, starving myself which at one point had me measuring at 5% body fat. Extensive brusing all over my body from sparing that doctors often took for physical abuse from my parents. And a very unhealthy relationship with food, food restricting, and eventually and inevitable weight gain when I no longer worked out at the pace I was keeping. And each previous attempt to lose weight was approached with a restricting prespective that I could no longer maintain leafing to yoyo dieting and gaining more each time. Feeling of guilt, frustration and self loathing as well as overexercising that I could not maintain and pushing exercises I could no longer physically do.
6. Not eating or drinking the day of competition. This is again related to weight class and martial arts "traditions and culture". Every single competition I participated in triggered migraine and physical weakness, dizziness. Some of it precipitated by above bad habits and some from having been taught not to eat or drink 24 hours before the competition. This lead to an aversion to competition in general and because competition was highly emphasized by the 3rd instructor my eventual burnout and leaving martial arts. Though I will say I learned the not eating and drinking thing from the 1st one.
7. Poor stretching habits. I was not aware of the difference between dynamic stretching and slow and controlled stretching until I became a massage therapist. So I will define the difference. Dynamic is a medium pace moving through the range of motion of your joints without pause. This includes the bouncing movement often used when stretching the legs. This type of stretching should be done Before the workout. It warms the muscles and helps the joints prepare for range of motion movements throughout the exercise. Then there is the slower stretching to increase flexibility in which you pause in each stretch to allow the muscle to lengthen. This should be done After the workout when muscles are warm. When exercising the muscles will tighten. This is why if you don't stretch after exercise you feel stiff and contributes to DOMs ( soreness). Often we would not spend enough time after a class to fully stretch and not have enough time to stretch all the muscle worked during the class. Sometimes dynamic stretching was done after class and longer stretching was done before. * Note the reason you do not do longer stretching before is increased risk of stretch injury and doing so decreases the performance and strength of the muscle temporarily meaning during your workout you are not working at full capacity of strength. I also personally did not register the importance of stretching and skipped it often. Leading to #8
8. Forcing stretches the first thing that comes to mind is the splits crank. NO. This is a terrible device. Forcing a stretch over lengthens muscle and tears it. I would use this device before class at my 2nd instructors instruction. So not only were my adductor and groin muscles injured while I was working out but performance and strength were reduced. I believe this device was created because of older traditional methods of increasing flexibility. Being that training often started in childhood in many traditions methods like kids extending into splits on blocks it's seems to have translated into the creation of this device. Teens and adults who have not been stretching since the naturally flexible days of childhood adopting these kinds of methods can easily be injured IMO.
9. Not having the same designated coach preping you for competition in the long term before and during the fight. When I went to nationals I was not being coached leading up to the competition and the person designated as my coach met me the day before competition but never returned. Another instructor ( who was an awesome person) arrived about 45min before the fight to warm me up. Which awesome that he was there for me but I didn't know him and he did not know me. The prep was an unfamiliar process that had not been established as a habit and routine for me. During the fight instructions were unfamiliar and I was not used to receiving any instructions while I was actually fighting so I hesitated when I heard him to try and catch what he was saying. Having a coach you are used to helps you establish a comfortable prep procedure, gets you each used to what the other is going to do during fights, and creates a trust that you are supported during the process. An understanding of what called out instructions mean and a knowing of how to execute them with out pausing to mentally process what was said. It's a rythem that is created between the coach and the fighter that is smooth.
10. Not using resistance training for strength building. I did not learn about strength training and how it works until after I left martial arts. We did use some body weight type resistance so I was gaining some strength but it was not deliberate or consistent. Don't get me wrong it is definitely my own opinion that this is valuable for martial arts and I later did visit schools that incorporated it. I think a concern for loss of flexibility was the reason I did not see it in the schools I was a part of. So if anyone is looking for flexibility and using resistance strength training. Keep in mind the stretching habits I discussed earlier.
11. Nutrition this was something not discussed at all while I was in martial arts. So I was not eating foods that supported strength, endurance and over all health. And because I did not know the importance of eating to fuel my workouts and health I was very often in a weaker state while trying to improve strength and ability and endurance. I struggled as I said with not eating at all as often as possible. So in my opinion Nutrition if a vital component for fitness and success as a martial artist.
12. Not following my own interests in learning martial arts. During the last few years I was a martial artist I was in a competition oriented school. Nothing wrong with that. But for me it was just not my passion and I became burned out and eventually left martial arts. My personal interest was geared more toward traditional practices, including mindfulness, developing discipline, meditation, and street survival and even military application and weapons. I did take a ninjutsu class for a while in Florida. It was the best time I ever had. It was just a bunch of people meeting at night in a park. We practiced meditation, Han bow, military tactics, street survival techniques, energy use, and tools like how to move silently, hide in your surroundings, knife techniques, body language and a bunch of other awesomeness. Unfortunately the instructor passed due to cancer. So my point is do what you are interested in and don't force things you are not.
* whew that's a lot if you read all this thank you and I hope that my experience helps you in someway. It is not about excuses and bitching about my past. It is a look for me at my past and how I can learn from it now in my new fitness journey. A genuine wish to share what I have learned from my past to help someone else. Martial arts was an incredible experience in my life for more then a decade. I met some amazing people, especially my instructors. I gained a lot of positives that I also hold to this day such as discipline, an appreciation for Asian cultures, mindfulness, critical thinking, and a confidence in the world by knowing how to defend myself. A love of exercise that it took me a while to tap back into but is now activated. Most of all once I examined the mistakes I made a deeper understanding of who I am and the value of being connected with my body. So thank to all those who taught me and gave me this gift.

The Goddess has given me such love and new understanding and knowledge. I am so grateful.

The Goddess has given me such love and new understanding and knowledge. I am so grateful.

I felt the urge to use my Goddess oracle deck this morning and this is what I got. Both Goddesses of wisdom, knowledge a...

I felt the urge to use my Goddess oracle deck this morning and this is what I got. Both Goddesses of wisdom, knowledge and creativity. I was looking for a yoga session to honor Sarasvati and discovered vedic astrology.

A lot has happened since I decided to get off Facebook I don't know if I will fully return to posting and scrolling. How...

A lot has happened since I decided to get off Facebook I don't know if I will fully return to posting and scrolling. However I want to thank everyone that sent me messages for my birthday. I found this video this morning and it is so where I am now. I am embarking on a new journey in my life that will require me to heal the self imposed isolation associated with the deep depression I have been in for so long. I am alive again in a way I don't think I ever have been before. The brain fog has lifted and I am learning so much about myself and new paths to healing my body, heart and soul. The Goddess has reached into my life and I bless and thank her. Even though this video is associated with Ganesha my prespective about the Devine is that it is both separate aspects in many forms it is also one in the universe. The Goddess guided me to this beautiful music and chant so that as I honor her I also embrace the Devine in and its wisdom in other ways. I struggle with trust in the Devine masculine but the Devine feminine calls upon me to heal that as well. So that I may be whole and this is how She sent me her message today. Ganesha I thank you for the blessing of this mantra.



Jackson, MI


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