Positive Parenting Tools and Strategies

01/05/2024

Listen to me chat to Radio Show host Jan on iHeart radio.
You can save it for later - I will post the link in the comments.

Todays topic: Positive Parenting.

27/04/2024

I was on the radio this morning.
Talking about parenting.
Thanks to those who listened
(Sadly Facebook didn’t show my post coz I included the link)

26/04/2024

I’m on the radio
Talking about parenting

Your Voice in the Valley

15/03/2024

Any parents struggling?
My next course is now live.
Please share with anyone you know who needs some help

14/03/2024

Parenting Article - Kids and Devices https://wix.to/gJy4zTA
Struggling to balance parenting with screen time limits? Let us help you create a healthy tech environment for your family. 🧒📱 Take action now and visit https://wix.to/u5pTaOe for exclusive resources.

Kids and Devices

11/02/2024

My first course is now up and running!!!
The first of four parenting courses.

01/11/2023

Do you feel stuck in life?
How do you describe this feeling ?

15/09/2023

For those who missed it
(Coz FB algorithm doesn’t like external links😊)

This is a different perspective on happiness.It makes it more attainable.The questions asked at the end (which aren't very audible in this video) are:1. I'm ...

28/07/2023

Next talk topic ?
Thanks for all your positive comments on my talk.
I’m looking for suggestions for my next talk please

25/07/2023

Happiness talk !

Many of you missed this talk.

(Facebook didn’t like me posting the YouTube link so didn’t show you 😊).

So for those who missed it - the link is in the comments

There was great engagement and I really enjoyed it
Am grateful to all who came along 😊

16/07/2023

However You may be interested to watch my video presentation on Happiness

(This isn’t directly about parenting😊)

10/04/2022

Here are a few words of advice if one child is taking things from her sister :

When we work with positive parenting we praise the positive behaviour and sometimes they need help with modelling the positive.

We need to ensure that the negative behaviour never works in their favour.

And the positive behaviour does.

So if she is trying to get something from her sister, she needs to learn a strategy that works and it needs to not be hitting .

If she is having a tantrum over it then we need to remove her from the situation but if we can get in before that - we calmly say something like - are you wanting that thing from your sister.

How do we ask for something ? (And teach her that if she doesn’t already know).

If her sister says no she can’t have it then she needs to accept that.

If it leads to a tantrum then she needs to move away until she calms down.

The idea being for her to learn to accept this.

14/12/2021

Have you lost your passion?
Have you lost motivation?

Or maybe you have not yet had motivation and passion?
Are you struggling to have satisfaction and a sense of accomplishment?
You’re being less productive
Do you sometimes feel negative ?
Or unable to cope?
And you beat yourself up and judge yourself
You’re mentally and physically exhausted

Does this resonate with you?

Do you listen to others and think that life seems complicated
Are others saying that life is harder
Are people doing better than you
They have a great easy life
Do they tell you to just get on with it
Do they show sympathy but then move on
Maybe they don’t really understand
Your life is different
Its harder for you
You have more going on
Or it is the same but you just can’t manage it
Do you give yourself a hard time about that
You think you should e able to cope
Tell yourself its not that hard really
Why are you making such a fuss
If only you have ore tie
If only it was easier
If only there was less pressure.

Do you feel like this?

Do you want to be excited by life
To wake up every morning and almost leap of out bed with excitement
What could you do
How much would you get done
You will be ike others who just seem to keep going
You have energy
And enthusiasm
Every one around you can sense it
They enjoy being around you
They reflect your energy back and there is happiness all around
Imagine being excited for the day.

You are not alone. So many people are feeling this Sometimes they make it look easy. But it isn’t. You aren’t the only one. We are all in the same boat. Others are feeling the same as you. It may not show, it may look different. If they aren’t in this pace now - they have been. They have felt it too. I know how you feel too. I’ve had this. Many have found that they need help. Sometimes just someone to listen. To download. Sometimes someone with more skills who have experience in this field.

Do you want practical help
Understand the concepts of stress
The cycles the body goes through
Realistic and relatable
Learn about yourself and how your stress works
Feel recognised and understood
What fills you up and what drains you

I’ve found some help for you.
It is a sheet with 5 steps.
A simple FREE pdf

FREE 5 steps to overcome stress/burnout.

Don't get to stress/burnout.
Catch it and stop it now.
If you are already there - then take action NOW.

Go to my website.
Read the article or
Go straight to the sheet and start taking ACTION.

Start to help yourself.
Go to my website or make a time to chat with me for FREE
Off load, download, get help, start now

09/12/2021

Would you give anything to have more energy?

Are you running on empty
Do you wish Christmas wasn't so close
Do you wonder how you'll find the energy to get through
Are you thinking it’s all too much
Do you feel like giving up
Are people saying how exhausting life is

Are you feeling the pressure

Do you wonder how you will get through
Do you feel it’s all going to fall apart
Who will pick up the pieces
Who’s there to take over and support you
How will ever be okay
When will you ever feel on top of things again
How will you find time to recharge
How can you get enough rest to feel motivated

Do you know these thoughts and feelings?

I know this feeling.
For years I had zero energy
It was all used up
I didn’t even feel refreshed in the morning
I was exhausted before the day began
Every day I wondered how I would get through the day.
And I wondered when it would end.
I wish I someone knew how to help
I needed someone to help me find more energy
I didn’t know why I was drained and didn't have energy
I didn’t know then what I know now.
Now I know how to conserve energy. I know what drains me. I know what gives me more energy. I have learnt how to be kind and look after myself.
So now - I have energy again. And life is easier. Which means it also more enjoyable. This means that my kids are happier too. And that gives me more support and happiness in life.

Do you wish you have endless energy
Imagine feeling you can take on the world
Imagine being able to do everything and more
What would that feel like
To always feel you can manage
Always feel there’s more inside you
What could you do with all this energy
What could you enjoy because you feel revitalised

So, if your energy is low and you want more energy - contact a life coach today.
Message me now.
Have a chat for free

07/12/2021

Are you always rushing?

Is life just one big rush?
Is everyone else saying how busy they are.
Everyone else is rushing around.
No one stops for long.
You don’t have time for people
You say - I’ll be in touch...
Let's catch up when we have time
Speak soon…..knowing it will be ages
Does life feel hectic
Is it non stop
Does it feel too much
And you feel like you are drowning

Do you feel this too?

Always trying to fit more in
Your to-do list is never ending
Never managing to find the time
Have you forgotten what enjoyment is?
Is it that rare
If only there was more time
Then you could have time for yourself
Are you too exhausted though
You don’t have the time or the energy even to know what would help you right now ?

Is life like this for you?

Do you wish you had more time for yourself
And more time for others
Would you love to stop still for a moment
How lovely would it be if someone said - let’s chat now!
Do you want to feel it’s easier.
Do you want to feel on top of things
Do you want to have time to enjoy life
Imagine having time to sit and do nothing
Imagine having energy

I know how you feel. I was there. Rushing around with work and kids and life!
I found it overwhelming. It was hard to stay on top of things. I wish I could have been on top of things. In the end I discovered my approach needed tweaking. My to-do list was too long, I was trying to do too much. I cut it down but it was still too much. I cut it down again and again. I wondered how I could cut out any more. I was exhausted. Every day. I realised my approach was wrong and so I changed it and then my life changed. It wasn’t easy and it didn’t happen overnight. I had to work it out for myself. I didn’t know it was possible. And now it's so much easier.
This meant that the next time I had this problem I was able to over come it. Eventually a system develops so that overwhelm is a thing of the past.

Would you like a fool proof system?

I’ve come across a coach who has a system that she uses to help clients. Head to my website for the free PDF.

OR

Do you want to know my system?
It's easy to understand
Have a free session now to discuss your life and how you’d like it to be.

Contact me now

03/12/2021

Are you so busy and your kids seem to be taking up all your time?

Wondering how you can get ahead?
There's constantly more and more piled on you
Your kids need so much of your time
You want your kids to be happy
You're spending time running around after them
All you hear is what they are needing
Or what you need to do for them

********Do you feel this too?*********

You feel there’s no time for you
There’s no time for what you want
You come last
Your kids are priority
Once they are happy then you will be able to think about yourself
If they behaved better….
You've spoken to other parents and they feel the same
Kids take up so much time and energy
Constantly struggling to keep on top of things

*******Is this sounding familiar to you*******

It's the same for everyone
Others parents are struggling too
So you tell yourself it's just life
Yet you wonder if there is a different way

It's not an easy task
Keeping so many people happy
It's no wonder there isn't time for you
So many demands on you
And you have to fit work in too!

I’ve been there too.
I have four kids
I worked hard at this.
For years
I had to stop and wonder if there's another way
Do you wonder that too
I tried many things
Have you tried things too
How can you get on top when you are constantly struggling to get the essentials done

Imagine if there is another way
And you can feel there’s less on your plate
Less on the constant ‘to do’ list
Then you have some time freed up
Some time for yourself finally
What would you do with that time.
Just imagine
That would be lovely.

I wish I’d had help
I was drowning so much that I couldn’t see the way forward
Is this how it is for you too
You’re not alone
Most parents feel this too

So what can you do?
How can you move forward?
Do you want to know how?
One step at a time
The first step is to take action:
Contact me for a:
FREE chat and a FREE PDF cheat sheet

21/10/2021

I’ve discovered something that should have been obvious
But I’ve never been told it before

My newest parenting clients are only now into their second week
As usual there was an incredible shift after just one week

I asked how confident they felt about parenting and how in control or in charge of their child they felt. I asked to score it before the first session and then again a week later.
They scored zero before I came along . This isn’t uncommon. This is the often the point at which parents call me in. They are at rock bottom. Tearing their hair out and at a total loss.
These are the good parent though. These are the ones that really want the best for their children. And they will do anything - including putting up their hand and asking for help. They are prepared to say ‘is it me’, can we be doing better, please show us we want to learn . This, rather than feeling they can’t ask because it makes them look bad, looks like they are failing.

You tell me one parent who wouldn’t benefit from help.

There isn’t one.
And the reason - even if you are as well trained as me - is because a parenting coach see it from the outside without the emotion .
As parents, we are so wrapped up in wanting the best that we miss how our emotions are leading our parenting astray.

Anyway, from scoring a fairly typical zero - just one week later they were on a five!

Now this isn’t unusual

Nor is it unusual that the child’s behaviour has improved hugely in just one week.

However what I loved hearing about these parents (who although separated are still joint in their desire to do better for their child) is the fact that there have been so many comments about how much happier the child is!
In just one week!!
As I said at the beginning - this should be obvious - but it’s never come through from so many sources about a child before. Life for this child has changed !

I can’t wait to go back next week

Well done to these brave parents who took the step to ask for help.

We all need help and not just with our parenting but also with our own messy lives !

07/10/2021

I tell my kids I’ve messed them up somehow

Their job is to work out how, and fix it !

Don’t get me wrong - I’m a good loving parent.

Here’s why I’ve messed them up - when they were kids , there was a lot they didn’t understand.

It’s an adult world and it is very confusing for kids.
It's the same for all of us.

We need to make sense of it.

When I was a little girl my father wasn’t very nice to me.

This wasn’t just confusing, it made me sad.

I didn’t know why he wasn’t nice to me.

But in an attempt to make sense of it I thought it was because I didn’t behave well enough.

He often told me off.

Perhaps if I behaved better then he would be better to me.

So I took control. I can fix this.

I’ll be good and he will be nice and love me.

However it didn’t seem to work.

I must be very bad then! I did notice that the better I behaved, the less I got told off.
So I could control this after all! Not fix it today, but take some control over it and therefore some control over my happiness.

So I’ve spent my life being good and nice.
Then people will love me more.
Surely this is true!?

We all - without exception - have made up links, as a child.

Good and bad, helpful and unhelpful. In an attempt to make sense of the adult world, during a time that our brains weren’t developed enough to make sense of it.

Not necessarily just due to our parents - ALL the adults around us can have a part.

Society has a part to play as we try to understand the culture we live in.

So even though it didn’t work totally as a child, we created a programme and rules to run by.

So we haven’t grown up. We like to think that we have but underneath it all we have our programming.

I tell my kids that I’ve messed them up somehow.

Their job is to work out how and fix it !

How did your childhood mess you up?
And are you ready to overcome it?
It’s not your fault.....
But it’s your job - YOU are the only one who can fix it.

30/04/2021

Stop ‘doing your best’
Your best is NOT good enough :

I have a friend - their mother always said : it’s ok, you’ve done your best.
They always assumed that they never had to do any better.
They were being told what they did IS enough.
So they never did do better!
Never learnt to try harder!
And always stopped at ‘enough’!

A parent, a week back, said I’ve done my best & my kids will agree with me. So I’ve done well enough.

I’ve tried hard especially with my kids. We all do .
People would say me - you’ve done your best. That’s what counts.

This way of thinking is stunting each of us who subscribes to it
It’s crippling our youth

Your best simply won’t cut it
It’s not good enough any more
Why? - because you need to do better than you best
If you can’t to see how - then learn from someone who is doing better.

Do better - for a better you
So YOU learn & grow
Do better for your kids
For happier healthier KIDS
They need you - as a role model.

It’s time to start doing more than you best
Stop settling for your best

If you need help with your own journey or the one you are setting your kids up for - please contact me today.
Don’t leave it til tomorrow

I will give you a free session - make your tomorrow become steps ahead of your today

14/03/2021

Are you ‘happy ‘ ?
Do you want your kids to be happy?

Consider what you are modelling
Kids learn from you !

24/12/2020

23/12/2020

Helping your child to manage their emotions - watch this video to find out how you can help.
Click the link in the comments.

22/12/2020

Emotions and kids

Emotions are important to you and your child. You need to help your child to understand and manage their emotions.
Click the link to read the full article on how you can help your child.

18/12/2020

How many times do you repeat yourself ?