Oak & Cedar Counselling Services

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Summerside, PE
Oak & Cedar Counselling Services

Specializing in Trauma, Perinatal, Reproductive, Grief & Loss and Infertility Counselling. Supporting clients in PEI, NB, NS and Ontario

Also helping individuals navigate Anxiety, Menopause/Perimenopause, and Chronic Illness. Providing services to New Brunswick, Nova Scotia & Prince Edward Island

10/31/2026

EMDR uses bilateral stimulation as one component (its Part 4 of 8)

There are lots of reasons for this.
1. It is believed to help the body feel safer while re-experiencing past traumas. When the brain is “taxed” it is harder to hyper focus (get lost in the memory). Imagine washing the dishes, listening to an audiobook, having a conversation with someone and planning your grocery list all at the same time. The brain will lose focus, and struggle to keep track. With trauma, this blurring, struggling to focus on the trauma memory is a key way we begin to desensitize to the memory so we can actually hold it in the working memory long enough to think about the memory differently and find healing.

2. This process allows the body to be part of the therapeutic process. It allows the body to feel, sense, experience within a supportive and grounding environment. Healing trauma is not just analyzing what happens, it’s also about helping the body heal from it endured, experienced. There is some research that states REM sleep patterns are mimicked, which support this calming, connected experience.

3. It supports the goal of EMDR which considers dual attention - being aware of and experiencing the past while being aware and present in the here and now - the way in which we heal. We don’t want you to be consumed by past events. BLS helps you notice, without being absorbed. To be aware, without being lost. As a therapist, if you do get a little too far into the past - we will change how we do BLS so that you can examine, notice, be curious, reshape the past without losing your connection to the present. This is safety. This is also how we reprocess. How we begin to heal, by staying present even when triggered.

Some commons ways we do BLS is:

1. Eye Movements.
I use my hand (traditional method) but also the light bar (it’s hard on the shoulder joints lol!).

2. Audio. There are different sounds we use - most choose a beep or soft whoosh. Sometimes we pair audio with another BLS.

3. Tappers. Or Pulsers. These are small devices, shaped like teardrops, that sit in your hand and make a vibration. These too can be paired - or used individually.

4. See comments

10/27/2026

The loss of a pregnancy can lead to acute and complicated grief

We experience a loss in the present and our bodies have to experience - and re-experience - that loss. In painful and at times ways that we were not prepared for.

And as we grieve what is

We also mourn and grapple with the loss of all the things that will not be.

And this invisible grief, complicated grief is hard to navigate

Sometimes it’s hard to identify and label all the things we are grieving

Sometimes it’s hard to make sense of our feelings or even know how to hold space for them or support them because they feel abstract. We are grieving what never was, but it felt so real. It felt like it was going to happen. We dreamed it, believed it, imagined it, planned it, so how can it just not be actually coming to be? And what’s the protocol for grieving something that never was, but we imagined it so clearly it felt like it was always supposed to be?

So if this is you. Please know you are not alone.

And your grief in the present, your grief for the future, it’s all very, very real.

💛

09/22/2026

I love EMDR

One, because I see it work over and over again

Two, because the therapy is so heavily researched, I know I am providing evidence based support every time.

Three, it’s client centered. Your voice. Your goals.
Your way, your say. You are in control. We stop, we pause, we breath, we move at your consent. There are many different ways to do EMDR and you get to decide. Your sense of autonomy and empowerment is what matters most in the space.

Four, you can integrate other evidence based modalities so easily, interweaving all the layers you need for healing in your journey.

If you’re interesting in connecting about EMDR, please reach out. Booking clients for November 💛

09/22/2026

Some of the distress we navigate - including burnout, overstimulation, overwhelm - can sometimes come from not setting healthy, honest limits with ourselves.

Boundaries are the lines we hold with others, that demonstrate our worth and our respect.

Limits could be considered the lines we hold with ourselves, that respect how many “spoons” we have.

They are not to restrict ourselves, to demean or punish - when set with honesty and self awareness they are often gifts we give ourself to protect our well-being.

Limits acknowledge that we have a finite capacity and cannot chronically live above our physical, emotional and mental capacity.

Limits acknowledge and respect the values we have and the boundaries we are trying to hold.

Some limits that can be helpful to reflect on:

💛 How much downtime do you need. We all need play, so what are the limits you need to set to allow for this in your life?

💛 Sleep, and knowing and prioritizing how much you need.

💛 Setting a budget and knowing the limitations on spending each month

💛 Social commitments and responsibilities, what is the limit for how much you can take in and do.

💛 Screen time - how much is too much, when do you need to log off

💛 Staying hydrated and nourished - how often do you need to refuel to stay focused and well?

I don’t know about you - but in my desire to show up for kids, my clients, my relationships, myself - I can absolute overextend - and when I do this - when I pass my own limits - my behaviour and mood can rapidly change.

Dysregulation, tearfulness, low patience. irritable, overwhelm, anxiety, agitation or restless, hangry

It can even show up as headaches, muscle pain, cramps, nausea, back pain, dizziness, jaw pain etc.

Similar to setting limits for kids - adults need limits too. Guidelines that help them regulate, recharge and reconnect.

When we are overstimulated and overwhelmed, exhausted - sometimes we need to be curious about our own limitations and how hard we are pushing. Living a life with no limits often leads us away from our values and can pull us away from the life we are trying to create.

This Fall - what are some of the limits that will help you thrive?

09/21/2026

23% of Moms/Birthing parents experience postpartum anxiety

Please know you aren’t alone, and support is available.
💛

09/18/2026

There are many fertility clinics in Canada. They are private, but their doctors are licensed and regulated as any other Health Canada physician/medical professional.

Some offer consultations pre-referral (most Ontario Clinics), some do not (ie clinics in Atlantic Canada).

In Canada, clinics can range from moderately progressive/conservative to more tech progressive (offering the same quality standard services but also introducing new and emerging evidence based techniques too). Success rates are not leaning toward one clinic over any others, they are all comparable - but not all will be the right fit for you!

In all clinics, testing focuses on determining cause (ie female or male related, or unexplained) and then from all the results they create personalized plans that include further testing as well as pathways for reproduction. To access any clinic you do need a doctor referral and every province has different guidelines they use before a referral will be made, with PEI having the tightest guidelines and parameters.

On PEI for example, specialized services at SHORS do all preliminary bloodwork, scans, s***m analysis as well as beginning treatment steps such as medication to support ovulation. They also often want a recurring history of loss, or a specific time period (sometimes 12+ months) of inability to get pregnant, before a referral will be made (there are exceptions!) Some find this process slow and at times not personalized to their situation BUT it is also a huge step forward for Islanders to see PEI invest in fertility health and respond with testing, interventions and supports on-Island that are standardized first steps at most clinics, as it reduces costs, travel and clinic wait times.

In Atlantic Canada we have 2 clinics - Moncton (Conceptia) and Halifax (Atlantic Fertility). They provide many fertility services, but they do not do PGT (pre-implantation genetic testing that does determine embryo success) and to access this additional service (there is a cost) people often work with clinics in Ontario (Trio for example)

Out of province care is often still covered by your health insurance, provincial/federal grants.

Continued in comments!

09/17/2026

Intrusive thoughts are involuntary and unwanted. They do not align with our values, wants or needs. They have nothing to do with what kind of person we are.

Often intrusive thoughts are confused with impulsive thoughts. Though impulsive thoughts are not always in our best interest (that impulsive purchase we later return!) they are driven by normal human emotions and desires (ie. Creativity, curiosity, dreams) and often do not cause distress.

Intrusive thoughts do not come from us, they happen to us. They caused distress such as shame, panic, guilt, confusion, and fear. They stem from our nervous system and represent how our system is interpreting our environment (where it sees danger, threats, harm or risk).

We cannot control it, they happen before we’re consciously aware. When we are under a great deal of stress, navigating grief, loss, transitions etc. or experiencing heightened negative emotions, such as fear, anxiety, or depression, we are at greater risk of experiencing more intrusive thoughts.

Intrusive thoughts might be words or images, they may even have a movie like quality. They can be graphic, disturbing, and very vivid. The thoughts or words themselves can be very bold and loud. Due to this, they trigger an intense reaction, which then can increase the risk of us experiencing more intrusive thoughts like these again in the future.

94% of people experience intrusive thoughts, 97% of postpartum birthing parents also experiencing intrusive thoughts. If individuals have a neurodevelopment diagnosis such as ADHD or ASD, or mental health diagnosis such as anxiety or depression, we are at risk for experiencing intrusive thoughts more frequently throughout the day.

Intrusive thoughts can cause shame so deep that they can convince people that they are a bad person capable of being harmful or dangerous.

Therapy such as CBT, Mindfulness Based CBT, Somatic or Parts Work and Exposure type therapies can all be helpful. Please reach out if you were experiencing intrusive thoughts that are impairing your day-to-day functioning because you do not deserve to navigate these alone!

09/16/2026

PPD affects approximately 1 in 5 Mothers/birthing parents in Canada and 1 in 10 Dads/Non Birthing Parents in Canada.

Across Canada we see variations in these rates, with BC reporting higher numbers BUT they also screen and intervene more frequently.

In some parts of Canada, in particular those with fewer resources or limited access to healthcare providers - as high as 80% or more are not even being asked questions about their own mental health needs during prenatal appointments.

For non birthing parents, most say no one ever asked or even considered that PPD could happen to them. And when it did, it blindsided them.

Newcomers to Canada experience 3-5 times higher rates, as do Indigenous Communities - all of whom may feel discriminated against, judged or even feel unsafe by traditional healthcare providers (please note many providers are wonderful, but language barriers and cultural differences can create unintentional harm including an inability to access informed consent). Many express feeling not connected enough to practitioners who they can freely communicate with, and who can support cultural practices and understand systemic barriers. This can create isolation, a lack of adequate supports and services, and a disconnection from the practices that buffer and mitigate their risk.

09/10/2026

This is a super quick snapshot

EMDR is 40+ years in the making
It’s one of the most studied and researched therapeutic modalities

So to condense 40 years of research, perspectives, ideas and evolvements into one post. Not an easy task 🤪

But as an EMDR therapist - my clients deserve to know this

What EMDR believes
What I believe

Take a scroll through and absolutely leave ideas in the comments of things you want added, because EMDR is so vast and amazing, there is always more to say 💛💛

*Please note these are my interpretations of vast research and there are always exceptions 💛

09/10/2026

I have the capability to do many things

But my capacity
- my energy
- my focus
- my time and availability

They may not be as geared up.

All too often, I can overestimate my capacity. In the excitement of a moment I say yes. In the middle of my cycle I am pumped. At the first of the week I have lots of plans.

But then things shift. Fade. Reality of the week can set in. My cycle changes phases. The responsibilities and roles and requirements add up and the space I thought I had gets a little smaller.

Part of the reason we can struggle to thrive, is we forget that just like our kids - we need limits too.

Setting limits are the most loving thing we can do. When it comes to parenting/pet parenting we set limits all the time. On food, on screen time, on sleep and activities. On what they can do and where they can go and even how they can do something.

Last week my son fell out of a tree. After a quick (thankfully!) trip to the ER we embraced that tree climbing is wonderful for mental health, but next time we do it with no crocs. A new limit lol.

This Fall, I want you to consider your limits.
You are capable, gosh so capable! So many skills and strengths and offerings to make to the world.

But you also need sleep. Nutrition. Rest. Play. A budget (if you don’t need a budget, I love that for you!)

We need to recognize our limits so we aren’t always living on the edge of burnout, the edge of exhaustion, the edge of blowing up or shutting down. Knowing our limits reduces anxiety and depression too. It deepens our connection with ourselves, our values and our needs - as well as deeply connecting us with our own lives and those in it with us.

Knowing your limits allows you to thrive. To freely say yes and no, to freely meet your needs, to give but then recover.

Can we live within our limits all the time? Nope. Some seasons work, relationships, events, unexpected challenges make this hard.

But the more we know our limits, the more we get in tune with what we need - and don’t need - what we can do, and not do - even in these moments of stress.

What are some of your limits?

What limits do you want to set this Fall?

Address

263 Heather Moyse Drive
Summerside, PE

Website

https://www.oakandcedarcounselling.com/

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