Prenatal consultation and Postpartum in-home care in Toronto. Nurturing the well-being of your growing family. We all deserve that time and space.
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The idea of hygge is what I wish for everyone who has just had a baby. Hygge (pronounced hu-guh) is a Danish word with no precise English translation, denoting a sense of cozy, warm, fun, safe -- a feeling of wholeness, in which all needs are met. Supporting hygge in the early postpartum is an age-old practice spanning cultures across the globe. Traditionally this caregiver role would have been fi
lled by mothers, sisters, aunties and cousins. In this day and age though, we don’t tend to live as close to our families, and we are all busier, and may lack the sense of family and community that we would ideally have to nurture a mother (or gestational parent) while she puts everything she has into nurturing the tiny new being that she’s birthed forth into the outside world. Thus, the need for a postpartum doula – a non-clinical care provider with the knowledge and experience to make this transition with your sweet new baby cozier, safer, more peaceful, more fun. The love I received in the first few weeks after my child was born allowed me the space to rest and heal myself, nurse her whenever she needed, and delight in her long-awaited presence in my home and my life forevermore. I would love to help create hygge for you.
Dear ones. Where can you soften with yourself? With others? What do you need to make that happen?
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I know I’ve been quiet of late. My mind and energies have been elsewhere. Things are brewing though, and when they’re ready to be shared, I hope you’ll be there for them.
We are still doing this.
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When she was little, I posted all the time because I wanted to do my part to normalize breastfeeding. I loved this connection with my tiny human, and was thrilled that it had come easily for us in spite of my previous breast surgery.
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I have always understood it to be her favourite thing in the whole world, which is why, when I tried to start weaning her on her 3rd birthday, it did not go so well. That was November 2018, and we’ve had many ups and downs on our nursing journey since. Lots of emotions for both of us. Lots of boundary testing. Noticing that none of my kid’s peers were nursing anymore (that I knew of, at least). Many times when I was determined to be done with it, because I wasn’t enjoying it anymore, because I was convinced it was (is) a reason that I’ve been struggling with my sleep and my hormonal health. (And maybe it is, at least in part.) I consulted with multiple lactation consultants/fellow midwives/naturopathic doctors/therapists/attachment specialists with the idea in (my) mind that I could convince her that she didn’t need “mup” anymore. She was never (never) convinced.
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We’ve been down to just nursing at bedtime for a long while now. I was pretty clear that 4.5 was a good time to stop, but then the date came and went.... The pandemic has impacted us in many ways, but I’ve been feeling in these last few months that this bedtime breastfeeding is something we both need for comfort and grounding. So for now, there’s no longer a cut off date. Just this rare , and the sharing of it with the intention to normalize something that’s even less popular than publicly breastfeeding an infant or toddler in this day and age.
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I’ve been working on a thing. I think it might be an e-book. And this might be the cover. It’s about 25 pages and growing, with a number of “worksheets” to make the plan your own.
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It’s about, as you may well know already, a topic that is very near and dear to me: wellness. An informed postpartum. A supported postpartum. An empowered postpartum.
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So tell me, if you’re pregnant right now, what are you concerned about for the time once baby arrives? Or if you’ve experienced a fourth trimester yourself, what was a particularly valuable lesson or resource for you? What did your support people do that was particularly wonderful (or particularly unwonderful)? I want to be sure this guide is helpful and inclusive, without causing overwhelm.
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This research and writing project is particularly exciting to me because is been a while since I created something that felt meaningful, and it’s been satisfying to put my focus here. I’ll keep you posted on its development.
***rpregnancy
☀️ SUMMER SUCKLING 💦
We all need additional hydration when it’s hot out and we’re sweating. For breastfeeding/ chestfeeding parent/babe dyads, as well as formula-fed bubs, there are a few things to consider.
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Babies receiving human milk don’t need to be supplemented with water when it’s hot out, because breastmilk is a natural electrolyte drink! Coming directly from the source (ie. not pre-pumped), milk will actually adapt to be more hydrating (higher water content) in hot weather. (Bodies are so smart!) Just be sure that baby has free access to nurse as often as they need. (You must remember though, you’re drinking for two, so keep that water, coconut water, or naturally sweetened lemonade - I like to sweeten with apple juice or just a small splash of maple syrup - on hand!) Signs of dehydration include a feeling of thirst, headache and irritability. In young infants
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Choose a shady spot for nursing, and if it's very sweaty between the two of you, wipe down with a dry towel as needed. Do your best to stay out of the sun between 11am and 3pm. A baby bath set up in a shady backyard can be a sweet relief for your little one, or for you to plunge your feet into.
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Formula-fed babies do need to drink extra water when it's hot out, so always keep a fresh sippy cup handy! In order to avoid chlorine intake, I am a big fan of families investing in a simple home water filtration system, like the installation of a carbon block filter, a countertop system, or most simply and inexpensively, a pitcher kept in the fridge. Be sure to adhere to the maintenance guidelines for your filter to ensure its safety.
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How are you all doing? Any other strategies for staying happy and cool while baby-feeding in the heat?
Solo-mama-in-the-city brain during a pandemic. Just in case you were wondering.
❤️🧡💛 LIBERATION FOR ALL, my loves. 💚💙💜
Here’s to more in our celebrations with a greater awareness of the roots of this movement. The Stonewall Riots, fighting back against police brutality, is how the 2SLGBTQ+ Pride movement began in 1969 New York City, and Marsha P. Johnson (who was Black and Trans; see second image) and Sylvia Rivera (who was Latinx and Trans) were the helmswomen. You can’t have true Pride without centring Transfolx.
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Here’s to Q***r families in their many shapes and sizes, fiercely loving their littles and still working hard for adequate representation in picture books, kids TV shows and movies, on medical/daycare/school forms, and within their own families. If you’d share your favourite q***r fam IG accounts, picture books and other resources for families with young kiddos below, I’d love that. 🌈
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✍️ 1st image by .ink ; 🎨 2nd image by 🙌
My 4 year old woke me three times between the hours of 3 and 6:40 this morning, so my offering today is simply this resonant quote from the wise and wonderful , author of *The Body is not an Apology*. ❤️ I suggested the other week that you go follow her, and in case you missed it, I’m suggesting it again! 🙌
IT’S FATHERS DAY // I’M THE KIND OF PERSON WHO GIFTS BOOKS MORE OFTEN THAN I DON’T 📚 ❤️ 📚
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If there was a father in my life that I was going to gift today, I’d gift them one or more of these titles by (mostly) BIPOC authors who are (mostly) dads. I encourage you to look up these books, these authors, and support your local indie bookstore! (Or really anywhere that’s not Amazon.).
THINK OF THE MOTHERS. 💔
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The mothers, whose children have died as a result of and the underlying , have been on my mind these past few weeks. I will never know what it’s like to experience racism, but I do know what it’s like to grow an entire human in my belly, to labour through blood, sweat and tears in order to bring her into the world, and the countless (and often thankless) hours over the years that it takes to raise her up. The hopes I have for her as she comes into her own, the dreams I have for her to have a long, healthy and fulfilling life are many. I do not know what it is like to live with the fear that just because of the colour of my child’s skin, she is more likely to die at the hands of government-funded (over-funded) employees who are supposed to keep our communities safe. But I can imagine it must be terrifying. Traumatizing.
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This afternoon I compiled just a small list of mothers who have lost their Black children (whether they were still children when they lost them, or if they were adult, each victim was someone’s baby). I was inspired to do so after reading the article “Mothers of Black Americans killed by police speak out: ‘Nothing’s changed’”.
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It’s clear to me that using my platform for mothers must include on-going engagement about race in the hopes that with awareness, education, and activism, fewer BIPOC mothers have to manage this brutal life-changing grief in the future. Fellow perinatal business folx, please tell me you’re planning to do the same.
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Last 📷 is of and her poster with a sentiment that has since gone viral. 🙌
Meet Zora, Quan Yin, and Lakshmi. 👩🏿🦱👧🏻👧🏽
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Zora was handmade in the Waldorf style of doll making by . Quan Yin was an unnamed hand-me-down (and has been my 4 year-old’s favourite doll from the jump), and Lakshmi I picked up from an independent toy store — they’re both made by . Zora is named for the late great author Zora Neale Hurston, Quan Yin for the Chinese goddess of compassion, and Lakshmi for the Hindu goddess of good fortune.
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Ensuring that almost every doll I ever got my kid represented a different ethnic background than our own was one of the very least things I could do to promote the value of diversity in my family. And it wasn’t as easy as it should have been. My mum and I hunted for BIPOC dolls. Our local toy shops, big and small, were hit and miss. I could never find non-white dolls at Costco, but my mum found some at Walmart (which I boycott for socioeconomic reasons).
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I will confess that when my kid’s Black ECEs in the toddler room approached me laughing about their surprise that when the big basket of plastic babies came out, Juniper generally gravitated to the darker-skinned ones, I was pleased. I hoped it meant that she was interested in diversity in spite of the fact that her family of origin and most of her classmates are of European ancestry.
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I gotta tell you, I had to sit on this post for a few days because I don’t want it to read as self-congratulatory, or performative (I’ve shared a great post about this by in my stories). I want to share to encourage you do to the same for the kids in your life (if you haven’t already) and to say that acts of can be big and small, but when it comes to parenting conscientiously, we can always do more. Because even if we don’t deliberately teach it, the messages of the capitalist, white supremacist patriarchy are pervasive, and your kid’s gonna pick up on them anyway. And “white = normal,” and “non-white = other” is not the standard I envision for our future.
Last week was not the time for white people to speak. It was the time for those of us who are white to mute ourselves - our content, our thoughts and opinions - and . It’s a real kicker to me that a lot of white people decided to take up space with their own stuff, but maybe they didn’t get the message from that to me appeared very widely circulated.
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I took a lot of joy in being introduced to 100s of IG accounts I was previously unaware of, and my social media feed is richer for it.
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I’m committed to amplifying these voices in even better ways than these utilitarian lists going forward, because effective movements are about ongoing change, not momentary blips on our privileged radars.
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Above is a list of 20 Instagram accounts of non-Black people and organizations with multi-ethnic staff that I’ve been inspired by for some time now. Their voices are not a substitute for what Black people have to share directly, but they’re still pretty inspirational. Of course, there are tons more. I’d love to hear some of your recommendations. ❤️
If you don’t already, you’re going to get so much out of following these important Insta accounts.
I sure do.
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This is my fifth post this week of Black Insta account recommendations, so please do check out the previous 4 and follow to enrich your feed! I’m super grateful for the work of the humans behind these accounts that I’ve been following for years, and excited for the ones I’ve only recently come across.
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If you are white, as I am, please remember while there is a lot to learn by showing up in spaces outside of your own cultural bubble, it is by no means the job of Black people to teach you about anti-racist action or to have to listen to your experience of racism. Please follow with humility. And if you share their work, always give credit (mention and tag).
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If you don’t already, you’re going to get so much out of following these important Insta accounts.
I know I do.🖤❤️
Who doesn’t love a good list?
This is the 3rd instalment of accounts I’ve complied of some fantastic Black parents (and/or those who work with kids and/or in the perinatal field) whose contributions to Instagram (and their work beyond that) I’d like to help . They’re tagged above, so click through to follow them!
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Do also check out the first two posts from earlier in the week, and tell me if there are other accounts you’d add to this list. I’d love to know about them!
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Finally, if I’ve made any errors above, please let me know. I’m all ears.
Who doesn’t love a good list?
I’ve compiled the accounts of some Black parents (and/or those who work with kids and/or in the perinatal field) whose contributions to Instagram (and their work beyond that) I’d like to help amplify. They’re tagged above, so click through to follow them!
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This post is part 2 of 2 on this theme today, so check them both out and tell me if there are other accounts you’d add to this list. I’d love to know about them!
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Also, if I’ve made any errors above, please let me know. I’m all ears.
Who doesn’t love a good list?
I’ve compiled the accounts of some Black parents (and/or those who work with kids and/or in the perinatal field) whose contributions to Instagram (and their work beyond that) I’d like to help amplify. They’re tagged above, so click through to follow them!
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This post is part 1 of 2 on this theme today, but are there other accounts you’d add to this list? I’d love to know about them.
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Also, if I’ve made any errors above, please let me know. I’m all ears.
"A Litany for Survival." Copyright © 1978 by Audre Lorde, from The Collected Poems of Audre Lorde by Audre Lorde. Copyright © 1997 by the Audre Lorde Estate. (This has too many words to share in Stories as I’d planned.)
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Photographer/creator of image unknown.
I had planned to post today for the first time in months. To talk about what the past 11 weeks have been about for me, and my inability to work. BUT! It can wait.
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I’m honouring the call put forth by Alishia McCullough - - to between now and June 8, will be using my social media exclusively to amplify the voices of Black activists via my Stories, in lieu of creating my own content. Those of us who are white can afford to talk a bit less at this time, and give space for those who experience personal and systemic racism and the associated relentless trauma.
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First image captured from , others from ❤️
brought to you by 🧡
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Speaking of binge-watching, anyone got any good Netflix (or Prime or Disney+) recommendations I might not have heard of? I can’t find much I’m excited about right now. Shows I’ve loved/enjoyed include: *xeducation , ***reye , Easy, , Atypical, , Chicago Fire, , / comedy specials, Modern Love, Glow-up, .... Maybe I’ve just watched everything there is.
Gosh I wish we could get in Canada!
And then there’s this perspective....
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From via 🙌🏻
When I feel anxious or low, I watch videos of my kid from when she was tiny. They always pep me up. I dunno if Juniper enjoying avocado 🥑 for the first time will have that kind of impact on you, too, but let’s give it a try, shall we?
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As an aside, a propos of — I found putting ripe avocado in this tool by was the best way for someone with minimal fine motor skills to actually get it into her mouth... sorta. 😜
Happy Valentines, babes. ❤️
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This lovely piece from 👏
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***rparenting
This is the face of a mama who has now done everything she could to get into nursing school:
✅ Ontario Universities Application and transcript acquisition from 5 post-secondary institutions
✅ Personal Statement polished and chopped way down with the skill and care of Vanessa Grant Media
✅ Reference Letter from the kind and enthusiastic Angela Grant Buechner
✅ Pre-req undergrad level General Psych course by distance ed (I got an A!)
✅ A 12-questions in 90 minutes online situational judgement test (similar to the 🛎 ringer interviews for the Midwifery Education Program, only with typing instead of human contact)
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Now to wait for an invitation for an interview. Universe, are you going to let me become a public health nurse?
Just checking in with this compassionate and valuable thought from .averyrose . It’s so apt at this particular minute in time when I am falling in loooooove 🥰 (one of the best kinds of ANYTHINGs!) ... and could care less about social media (and practically EVERYTHING else. 🤪)
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I do, however, care what’s on your beautiful mind, so please tell me how you yourself are stretching yourself to do ANYTHING, but not everything. And forgive me for my inability to multitask while I’m in this most perfectly-timed Valentines week haze. ❤️🥰❤️🥰❤️
“IS IT A BOY OR A GIRL?” We start getting asked by people (mostly strangers) starting halfway through pregnancy, and sometimes beyond baby’s first year. As someone who rebels against prescribed gender roles, and gets that a baby’s assigned s*x at birth may not line up with their gender identity as they grow into themselves, this is not a straightforward question to answer.
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In pregnancy 🤰🏻 I just told people that I did not know. 🤷🏻♀️ ... I heard of one couple whose response was “We don’t know, we just hope it’s gay!” 😁
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Once my kid was born, I started responding “Does it matter?” (thinking, why the heck is a stranger asking about my kid’s junk?), but it came across as overly defensive towards well-meaning folks (especially elders) who just wanted to connect. So I was relieved when it occurred to me to reply with a smile and “For now, just a baby.” It gave me the opportunity to explain myself if need be (I worked to give off a laissez-faire vibe while offering the opportunity for education/reflection), while not playing into the boy-girl binary. If someone decided for themselves what my baby must be, I just let them have it. “He” or “she,” it made no difference to my kid.
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I’d love to hear how you respond to this question and your personal experiences with gender expression assumptions people have had about your baby.
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And if you’re someone who typically asks about a baby’s gender, what other introductory questions might you ask instead? 💖💙💛❤️💜💚🧡
I love this image from ❤️ The parent-baby connection... it always gets me.
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What feels healthy and safe for your family, in your community? What doesn’t?
Friday evening hygge feels.
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🎨 by the prolific and delightful / ♥️🙌🏻♥️
I figure this quote will be seen by whomever really needs to see it.
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The first time I read it, in the early postpartum, I found it extremely validating. I’m not comfortable sharing the details publicly, because it’s not only my story — it’s my daughter’s too, but if you have had the experience of having a dad or baby-daddy who didn’t show up as you might have hoped, or of being a surprise solo parent, or been part of a divorce in some way, or have had to get better acquainted with Family Law than you ever imagined, maybe you get it.
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Babies don’t exist on their own. They can’t. They *are* in the context of the person who carried them from a collection of cells till they were a human earthside, the person (often the same person) who nurses them and attends to all their other needs around the clock, soothes them to sleep, and pours their big heart out for this tiny new one. 💞
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John Wooden (1910-2020), from whom this quote comes, was an American basketball coach. 🏀 🙄 Go figure.
I have been trying extra hard to learn this recently. Ironic, isn’t it, that softening in particular contexts can feel hard for me? Does anyone else feel this, too?
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I wonder if it’s relatively universal for those of us who had childhood experiences where we needed others, who were stronger, to advocate for us but they didn’t.... I wonder if we generally butt up against the possibility of feeling safety in softness?
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Times when I try to be brave by softening:
1) when I am humbled by a previous belief/opinion that’s been challenged and my perspective has to change.
2) when I am PMS’ing hard and I want to call the shots, but instead make some room for my 4 year old’s opinion, remembering that there’s so little she gets to control.
3) when I don’t assume that someone who hurt me was intentionally doing so.
4) in labour, when the contractions felt too long and too close together, but I “took my breaks” in between, relaxing as much as I could to preserve my energy for the next one.
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How about you? When have you been brave by softening?
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🎨: 🙌🏻❤️
I hit up the superstore of west end used bookstores the other day for some early 2020 READS. 📚
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Memoirs and self-help books are really my jam. I’ve just started *Help Me* by which is the best of both worlds: a memoir about test driving self-help books! I know many of you would enjoy it.
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What’s on your reading list for this year? Tell me.... No really, I want to know! (Equally interested to hear if you’ve read any of the books pictured here, and what you thought of them.)
Toronto, ON
M6R2E7
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When I feel anxious or low, I watch videos of my kid from when she was tiny. They always pep me up. I dunno if Juniper enjoying avocado 🥑 for the first time will have that kind of impact on you, too, but let’s give it a try, shall we? • • As an aside, a propos of #babyledweaning — I found putting ripe avocado in this tool by @booninc was the best way for someone with minimal fine motor skills to actually get it into her mouth... sorta. 😜
DON’T MISS OUT ON THIS GIVEAWAY! I’m gifting 6 local people these natural products bags valued at over $40 each. Hop over to the previous post to enter. 👇 • In just 59 seconds I’m flashing you some of the contents of these bags — 3 kinds of diaper ointment, vitamin C and iron supplements, vegan protein powder and more! • GIVEAWAY CLOSES TODAY (Saturday at 7pm). Best of luck everyone! 😘
🔈 Sound on 🔈 • I can’t even.... 😍😍😍 I’m always telling parents how important it is that we talk to/with our kids. Even if we think they don’t understand us. It helps to develop their brains, their language, and their sense of inclusion. Plus in this case, could it be any cuter?!? ♥️ • Reposted from @averageparentproblems ・・・ ❤️ Found on Facebook: Shanieke Pryor
Most of us don’t really know what a baby drinking at the breast looks like until we get the hang of nursing our own child. 🤱🏽 :: :: Trying to learn a completely new skill after labouring and birthing your baby is less than ideal, and I think we do new parents a huge disservice by generally keeping breastfeeding under wraps. :: :: Did you do any breastfeeding preparation prenatally? Where and with whom? If you’re expecting, did you know that a lactation educator like myself would be happy to help you in pregnancy? Another option is to attend your local LaLeche League meeting while your babe’s still on the inside. A little prep can go a long way towards building your confidence and getting your baby well-nourished. :: :: 🎥 of my own tiny one in her first week of life (once my milk came in, of course!).
This was my baby two years ago today (at 3 weeks old). It’s still one of my favourites. My advice to new parents: record it all! You can decide later if you don’t want to save it, but it’s the only way to get the really good stuff. #hyggemama #littlemoments #serveandreturn #talktoyourbaby #goodnaturedhiccuper
Hear me explain on Rogers TV why getting online info about parenting doesn’t cut it. We *need* connection. You can get that at 4 Trimesters event this Saturday. (Sorry about the vid quality!) #4trimestersTO #hyggemama #ittakesavillagetoraiseachild
Team Nutrition - Equipe Nutrition
Jane Street
Judy C., Your Dietitian at Loblaws
High Tech Road
Elen Azevedo Registered Dietitian/Nutricionis
Saint Clair West
Team Nutrition - Equipe Nutrition
Eglinton Avenue E
