11/05/2025
I wonât pretend I was always the most responsible daughter when it came to Motherâs Day back in Australia. But my Mum never held that against me.
When it was my first Motherâs Dayâafter Kylo was born, during lockdowns in Australiaâshe still found a way to celebrate me, even though I was on the other side of the world in MĂ©xico. She scoured the local jewellers for something that said âMUMâ (not âMOMââshe was always fierce about Australia having its own identity, not being swallowed up by the US). She bought me a necklace that said âyummy mummyâ because that was all that met her prerequisite. I cringed at the timeâbut now, itâs one of my most prized possessions.
She also got me a card. In it, she wrote: âCongratulations. Happy Motherâs Day, Kylo FoxâNumber One Son.â
She loved her grandchildren with a depth and freedom she never had the luxury of when raising her own kids. She worked nights. She parented alone. She was exhausted and burnt out, doing everything she could just to provide for 3 of us.
As a Nanna, she got to be funâsoft, silly, loving. She was no longer surviving, she was finally living. Her relationship with me changed too, because she could relate to me like a mother, like so many patients over 40 years.
Itâs my first Motherâs Day with a heavenly mother.
But strangely, I feel her everywhere. And in many ways, as close as I ever did. My first Motherâs Day without Matt as far as ever.
Rather than nostalgic as a daughter, I feel proud as a mother. Iâve always seen her for who she wasâstrong, gritty, capableâbut I never imagined I could be as brave and resilient as she was.
The truth is, I wasnât⊠until the unimaginable happened and called the status quo into question.
Watching her fight until the very end made something in me resolute.
To not accept for myself or my children what she wouldnât have accepted for us. I owed her that!
To overcome my doubts, anchored in her strength.
To carry forward the ferocity that shaped me, and now shapes the way I mother.
Happy Motherâs Day, Mum.
Your legacyâs mine nowâin every brave decision I make: you believe I deserved more even if I didnât, & in the âone foot in front of the otherâ of single morherhood.
