11/05/2024
We will be heading to Napa this week. 🍷 I am both extremely excited and if I’m being completely honest, a little bewildered. You see, I don’t really drink as much alcohol as I used to. And I definitely don’t drink w**e in the volume or frequency that I once did. Therefore my tolerance is kind of in the toilet. That’s good and bad, right?! 😜
But this is what I’ve realized as the Caroline today vs the Caroline from 4 years ago. I am going to Napa with other couples to enjoy their COMPANY, the beautiful SCENERY, amazing FOOD, and really tasty w**e. My focus on the alcohol piece is completely different now than it used to be. 😉
I’ll be the first to admit that I used to drink w**e to numb out some of my feelings. Frustration, anger, exhaustion, and the notion that “I deserved that glass (or 4) of w**e because my day was hard”. 😢
Y’all, I was hiding behind that w**e glass because I wasn’t really ready to face the hard. The hard of dealing with my emotions that were warranted, but still difficult. The hard of not liking what I saw in the mirror. The hard of being so uncomfortable in my own skin that I felt like I needed some alcohol to gain confidence. (It was fake confidence just so you know.) 🙄
So I am very much looking forward to the new Caroline who no longer use alcohol to cope, but instead will enjoy a wonderful trip with wonderful people - without having to hide a darn thing. 🥰