10/11/2026
What looks like “acting out” may actually be communication.
Yelling. Hitting. Pushing caregivers away. Refusing care. Throwing things. Pacing. Swearing. Becoming suddenly agitated.
These behaviors can be difficult and upsetting, but a person living with dementia may no longer be able to clearly explain what is wrong or what they need.
Instead of asking:
❌ “Why are they acting like this?”
Try asking:
💜 “What might this behavior be telling me?”
Look for possible reasons
Before assuming the behavior is simply part of dementia, consider:
🔹 Pain or discomfort — Could something hurt?
🔹 Hunger or thirst — When did they last eat or drink?
🔹 Toileting needs — Could they need the bathroom or be constipated?
🔹 Fear or confusion — Do they understand what is happening?
🔹 Overstimulation — Is the environment noisy, crowded, or overwhelming?
🔹 Fatigue — Are they tired or being asked to do too much?
🔹 Frustration — Are they struggling to communicate or complete a task?
🔹 Approach to care — Are they feeling rushed, corrected, restrained, or pressured?
🔹 Medical changes — Pain, infection, dehydration, medication effects, or delirium can sometimes contribute to sudden behavior changes.
What caregivers can try
💜 Approach slowly and calmly.
💜 Use short, reassuring sentences.
💜 Avoid arguing, correcting, or demanding an explanation.
💜 Give the person more time to respond.
💜 Reduce noise and stimulation.
💜 Step away briefly when safe if tension is escalating.
💜 Redirect toward something familiar or comforting.
💜 Look for patterns—what happened before, during, and after the behavior?
Remember
The behavior is what you see.
The reason is what you need to find.
A sudden or significant change in behavior deserves extra attention, especially when accompanied by changes in alertness, pain, fever, weakness, eating or drinking, urination, breathing, or other new symptoms. Contact the healthcare team for guidance; seek urgent help when there is an immediate safety or medical concern.
💜 Caregiver reminder: The goal isn't simply to “stop” a behavior. Understanding what may be driving it can help you respond to the person behind the behavior.
From the Dementia Care Behavior Guide
Created by a Registered Nurse & Certified Dementia Care Provider.
