01/19/2024
Douglas Nyce, Family matters,
Your interviews on media reveal unresolved anger & your face seemed distorted with rage.
Being abandoned for 40-years, you got to meet your mother in Carlifonia hotel, instead of excitement, pain was stimulated. I clearly understand, and feel the validity of your pain since I come from the same trait of a broken family.
The major problem identified in dysfunctional families is that we/children tend to carry/inherit the past bitterness & failures of our parents. We judge life according to what we were told, watched or experienced.
Me & you share tough beginnings, I never got chance to see my father & Mom live together. Watching other children come to school with their parents was like a movie. However, I’ve been keen to choose inner peace, healing & forgiveness. Life happens for a reason.
This process can take a long time. And might require family therapy specialist.
The unrealistic part in this situation is to imagine that we still can fit into the present life of our separated parents. It’s impossible.
In most cases, when parents separate & each finds their new life, children tend to be victims of trauma due to the underlying psychological impact.
My piece of advise to you, my brother.
You can’t change the past, but you can change/choose how your life & family would become. We have an obligation to block undesired/wrong seeds from invading our new family. By God’s grace, we can cut off negative forces inherited in our bloodline.
As you mentioned on tv, your mother never opened up to her new husband about the children she got from her first marriage. Yes, it’s painful to feel rejected, abandoned & betrayed, but seeking your way in her life might instead develope more wounds.
Pursue inner healing! As long as your mom’s new life/marriage doesn’t pose any risk in your life, forgive, bless & move on.
Incase her attitude changes, and calls for reunion, go with an open mind & clean heart. Though the natural bond will never develop, healing, love & harmony shall be cultivated.
You said she’s a famous preacher in America, this position doesn’t necessarily make her a perfect parent. It’s wrong for people to believe that preachers are superhuman. We all have a thorn in flesh.
Meanwhile, continue to build a new path for your lineage. Let your children & wife find something different & better.
I guarantee you, a happy family shall always will be your perfect source of healing & wholeness.
Above all, may God give you wisdom, to write a good legacy for your children, & grandchildren.
Yes, we can be authors of new beginnings!
