10/28/2024
Once upon a time, I was able to observe an IG Live with of and , and something Stacey said to Onikah impacted me in such a big way: "I don't believe in balance, I believe in Jenga."
Stacey discusses stacking up the pieces of who we are and pulling out the pieces based on necessity and urgency. She discusses this consciousness of which pieces have to move RIGHT NOW, which pieces we want to move, and which pieces have to move but not with as much urgency. She goes on to say the most important part of this is structuring your life so you can move the pieces around and not be driven by someone else's urgency for us but rather by meeting our own responsibilities.
Inevitably, the Jenga tower will fall at some point (and continue to do so from time to time!) because sometimes the wrong piece gets pulled at the wrong time, but with agency and autonomy you can build it back.
I'll often use Stacey's Jenga analogy when discussing eat!ng d!sorder recovery with clients. Sometimes we pull out one piece thinking one thing will happen, but in reality the tower does unexpected things and may even wobble and shake and even tumble down. Sometimes there's urgency, and sometimes there's more space to choose the piece.
Through support and nurturing your autonomy and sense of agency, you can build your tower back—however many times it takes.
