STUFF Therapy

03/03/2022

Thinking about spring cleaning?

You can choose to get it done this spring,
you can allow your house to be calm,
you can stop looking for things all the time,
you can enjoy living with your family members,
you got the control of your stuff,
and you can keep your mind peaceful and focused!

01/01/2021

I will be in this seminar talking about creating/organizing your self-care space! This starts on 1/12/2021 - register today!

https://trueyouadvantage.teachable.com/p/self-care-summit

This online seminar includes;
1. Discover Your Self-Care Needs Written in Your Hands, Elaine Callahan
2. Self-Care for the High Performer, Felicia Ford
3. Crush Your Cravings with Tapping, Vickie Griffith
4. Self-Hypnosis for Weight Loss, Vickie Griffith
5. Energy Clearing, Brenda Gruver
6. DIY Foot Soak, Gloria Henderson
7. Chakra Balancing, Lisa Marks
8. Sacred Cacao Ceremony, Helen Millar
9. Gain Focal Confidence, Melissa Rae Quinones
10. How to Start Your Day the High-Vibe Way, Shelli Roberts
11. Creating Space for Self-Care, Manami Workman
12. Stretches to Soothe Upper Back and Neck, Amanda Chou
13. Stretches to Soothe Low Back and Hips, Amanda Chou
14. World-Building: Sensing the World You Envision, Wes Gow
15. Exploring Watercolor as Self-Care, Cheryl Buckel
16. Improving Sleep, Courtney Bear
17. 10x Your Self-Care
18. Moon-Phase Planning
19. Beauty quest

And more! Very interesting topics and it is a great way to start a new year😊

There is always something "more important" to do. Or someone needs something from us. Or we've never seen healthy self-care demonstrated. Or we don't know where to start.

31/12/2020

This is from Oprah's book, What I know for sure. What are you going to do to start 2021?

What Oprah knows for sure about decluttering your life and making space for more to come.

27/12/2020

What to do with all the gifts that you don’t want to keep?

Christmas is over and did more STUFF come in your way?

Receiving gifts is a heart-warming thing and I feel so grateful for every single gift. However, did you get something that you did not really like or you will not use?

Here are some ideas for that situation;

#1:
(Step 1) Say 'Thank you' to the gift out loud
(Step 2) Say 'Good bye' to the gift out loud
(Step 3) Toss it or donate it to a thrift store.
You received the sender’s kind thought and action, so ‘thank you’ will close the purpose of the gift. You don’t need the gift anymore, so saying ‘good bye’ to it with gratitude. Someone else who finds it at a thrift store can appreciate it much more than you would.

#2: They might find out you got rid of the item?!
This is a scary situation for some people. It really depends on the person and the relationship, but the best way is to tell the truth in a nice way. That way, you can avoid receiving unwanted gifts year after year, or keep telling lies to cover your original lie. However, it’s actually not their business to control your possession, so you really want to assess how they are treating you when it is affecting how you live your life. Keep your boundary nice and clear. (Didn't your parents tell you to stand up for yourself when you were little?) If you lose friends over this, probably it was not your true friends.

#3: Re-gifting
When you keep the item to re-gift in the future, think about who you can possibly give to. If you cannot think about a person or occasion, probably it’s a good idea to donate it. Selling at Facebook market place or Offerup would be a good idea, but it’s wise to have a deadline to sell. Otherwise, it will stay in your home for a long time, and that will be something that you have to manage as well. When you put it on the market to sell, put a sticky note with the deadline date or set a reminder in your calendar to donate the item if it did not sell by that date.

The holiday season should be fun and peaceful. If you feel like it’s work or you are stressed, you need to re-evaluate your ‘tradition’ or check your emotions about it. December is supposed to full of gratitude and feeling joy all around.

If you get stuck or overwhelmed, you can have Stuff Therapy!
Phone: 757-254-4305 (call or text)

03/05/2020

Control What You Can

Everything seems to be out of routine with this pandemic in spring 2020. No one has ever experienced anything like this. So, here are some things you can do to get organized in your life style!

Tip #1: Tackle ONE priority today.
Have you heard the word priorities in plural? Here is the definition of priority from the Longman Dictionary: the thing that you think is most important and that needs attention before anything else. Yes, we do have priorities in life, but they all seem so big and hard to tackle. List ONE priority that you want to get done for the day, and deal with it.

Tip #2: Think about why you FAIL to get things done.
Ok, you could not tackle ONE priority? You wanted to, but things happened and you did not get to handle that? Yes, life happens, but things happen all the time to some people. Things do happen to everyone, but not everyone lets those things control their day. When you realize you did not get your priority done today, take 15 minutes to think about why it did not get done today. I recommend writing your thoughts down because the reason becomes so right-in-your-face-obvious. The reason can even look really stupid when you write AND read it. (Reading out loud is the best to get embarrassed privately!)

Tip #3: Estimate the time frame to COMPLETE the task.
Treat each task (yes, even small ones) like your business project. Estimate how long it would take to complete. “To complete” is the key. I used to have so many things I’d started, but hadn’t completed yet. Those tasks were hanging over my head – they even gave me a feeling of inferiority. The feeling was not huge, rather more like the size of a grain of rice, but it was there and I knew it. One tiny grain of rice can pile up and make a rice dish! This is not a good business. I realized I’d failed to estimate the time properly. One task does not mean it will only take 1 hour. It would take 1 month or even 2 months to complete. Once you estimate the time frame for completion, you can schedule proper times to work on it, and you will get to the finish line with pride and a big smile on your face. I am sure you do this naturally for business projects. I still have some things left incomplete, but I decide what my priority is and schedule the rest, so they are in definite process of getting done. The tiny negative feeling in my head is no longer there.

Tip #6: STOP watching the news.
The news basically feeds you fear. I would never know there had been a murder at the shopping center parking lot in my area if I did not watch the news. Some people tell me, “But you don’t get to know what is going on around the world!” Yes, I don’t know that, but I don’t have to know who got arrested in my town. Things happen all the time. Even in rural areas, horrible things happen. It’s not being ignorant, but choosing what you feed yourself. If I had seen news of a murder, I would look at my neighborhood in a whole different light. I would feel fearful walking in the parking lot. The guy got arrested, so he is no longer there, but fear settles in. Also, it’s hard to watch news for only five minutes. You will end up spending so much time just watching it, and will not get more important things done. Was the news you just watched worth more than getting your priority done? If the answer is yes, watch the news. But if the answer is ‘hell no,’ you have to change your choice. You are in control of whether you watch or don’t watch.

Tip #7: Control what YOU can.
Focus on yourself. You can change things about you, but not about others. This is the truth. I used to be naïve and try to change others. Now, if something or someone bothers me, I think about how I can change myself not to be bothered. If this COVID-19 situation is annoying and challenging, you cannot change it, so how can you deal with it? This example might look huge, but it is not. Things happen all the time, so why not stop letting ‘things’ control you? Remember a time your mom told you that she was proud of you? Wasn’t it a time when you took pride in yourself and achieved something (even putting your toy away earned her honor!), or just simply acted like your true, awesome self? Now that you are a grown up, you can relate to what your mom felt. Now it is your turn to be proud of yourself. Stop beating yourself up, and pat your shoulder for getting even the small things done. (Putting your toy away is a small thing, but certainly a step to being a big boy or girl.)

Tip #8: Create your ROUTINE.
Routine is king. This is what someone told me as a parenting tip at my baby shower. I had no clue, but the simple principle stuck with me. This was always true ever since day one of parenting. By creating a routine, I got things under control. The kids knew what to expect, so they felt secure. Routine is like traffic lights. Red means stop, and green means go. People go by the rules, simple and easy. Once you have that, it is automatic; no brain power necessary.
During this social distancing time, I’ve started using online grocery order for pick up, and grocery box delivery, because it’s easier and faster than going grocery shopping. In a few weeks, I will stop using big grocery stores, and will use CSA (Community Supported Agriculture) from a local farm so that I can support local business and eat more nutritious food. More sustainable, fresher foods are better for us anyway. I created my new routine that works for me, which turned out to be a new discovery.
Mindset is what creates an organized lifestyle. If you want to have control of your lifestyle, YES you can. If you settle for a life out of control, that is what you are going to have. Say ‘hell no’ to your old habits and start changing something to control what you can. Are you sick and tired of being a certain way? Start small. Always remember what your mom told you – I am proud of you. Start today and say that sentence to yourself. You get the best feeling when you say those words directly to yourself.

https://www.stufftherapy.co/professional-organizer.html

08/03/2020

Hate doing laundry?

This blog is for the people who have relationship problems with laundry.

You wear clothes and wash them. This relationship will stay the same. So, let’s have a good relationship!

Tip #1: Identify exactly what you don’t like about doing laundry. Basically, there are the washing part, drying part, folding part, and putting clothes away part.

(a) Washing part haters: Suck it up and just appreciate the modern technology! Half kidding and half true here, if the appliances are not really working property, you need to replace or give it a good cleaning. Washers need a regular cleaning monthly. There should be drum cleaning cycle option. This is something you need to do because a dirty washer cannot make your clothes clean. Take care of your teammate.
(b) Drying part haters: Again, suck it up and be grateful for your dryer. Always clean lint holders to prevent fire. This is a huge hazard and you don’t want to leave home while drying and come back to the burnt home.. It’s something you must do! It is like you have to put gas in your car to run. This is a house management and it is a serious business. How about vacuuming inside the drum? Clean appliances make me happy. How about you?
(c) Folding part haters: create a system not to fold clothes. You can designate your family member to fold them. You can have family members bins (label each bin with names) by the dryer, and you just throw clothes into the bins. This does not work with fabric that get wrinkled though. What worked for me was to time how long it took for me to fold. My actual time was only 2 minutes or so. In my head, it was more like 10-15 minutes. Now that I know it is only a 2-minute task, I don’t hesitate to tackle.
(d) Putting clothes away haters: Have someone else do the job. All you need is ask. Life is simple. When it’s complicated, you need to find why.

Tip #2: Do the laundry more often.
If your laundry pile is huge, it can be overwhelming and it will take more time. You will have to look for things only to find out they are in the hamper. This might not work for everyone, but I do laundry every night. I will have clean clothes every morning, so I don’t have to have lots of clothes in my closet or kids’ closet. My children grow out of their cloths every 5-6 months, so I only have a few tops & bottoms. Doing laundry daily works to have a small wardrobe. Again, find a good laundry cycle that works for you.

Tip #3: Imagine the life without your washer and dryer.
My dryer got broken last year. I never appreciated that guy so much. My grandmother had to wash clothes by hand with cold water in winter (she lived in a snowy area). The reality of you not liking to do the laundry might not change, but maybe we can learn to suck it up and appreciate the technology for less work. I treat my washer and dryer like my best friends, and I call them so. They never complain and they just get the job done every time I push the buttons, so I appreciate all they do! Changing the angle of looking at things can be a game changer. When you can find things you can be grateful about doing laundry, you will be able to enjoy or don’t mind doing the chore.

Tip #4: Love your laundry hamper/basket.
If your plastic laundry basket does not excite you, you can pay little more for a nicer woven basket and voila, your task can be little more fun. I use a willow plant pot from Ikea because it’s the right size for my closet and it has a plastic liner inside so that cleaning is so easy, and not to mention that is perfect for putting wet washcloths or literally dirty muddy clothes that your kids put in.

Tip #5: Make your laundry room a fun space.
Simple, but if you love the space, that will get you excited (at least little bit more than before) to do something there. Why is Starbucks the more fun place to get coffee than Dunkin Donuts? Nothing wrong with Dunkin Donuts and let’s not talk about taste here, but Starbucks got good stuff going on. People are more friendly (that is what they are trained to be), and their décor and furniture are nicer. The whole experience is so much different although the end product you get is the same. You can apply Starbucks experience effect to your laundry room. Paint, decorate with fun wall art/decal or get colorful washer & dryer. Go over your laundry room items and if you find something hard to use, replace with something more convenient. Put your laundry detergent in a cute dispenser or use a glass container for pods or laundry pins. A turn table for small items is a great idea. This idea works great for under the sink or kitchen cabinet for supplements, oils, condiments etc. Getting a new set of washer and dryer is not realistic, but spending some bucks to add fun items on the wall or use a dispenser instead of the store-bought plastic laundry detergent might change your experience in your laundry room.



Tip #6: Buy the same socks.
Do you have missing socks? No more run-away socks. I buy same socks with same color as much as I can. Kids socks are all the same, so I don’t worry about mis-matching or missing socks. They are usually grey or black – if you feel like white socks are too much work to keep clean, it’s time to break up with them. As I mentioned in Tip #2, I have three pairs of socks + two pairs of workout socks. Socks should be your friend, not the enemy.

Tip #7: User laundromats/Cleaning service.
The person at a laundromat can do laundry for you. Take your laundry bag in, leave it there, pay someone and pick it up – done. Or hire a cleaning person who offers laundry service – money can buy certain things.

Hope these tips can help you to have a good long-term relationship with laundry. If the relationship is not going anywhere and stuck, contact me – you need Stuff Therapy.

https://www.stufftherapy.co/

27/01/2020

Why are things everywhere in the house?

I was having a Skype session with my client. When she moved her iPad, the ‘stuff’ in the background was on the screen for a second. It was a combination of pink, red, white, black and gray in a pile. I had to ask her to tell me what those things were after the session. She laughed and moved her iPad for a closer look… There were a few winter jackets, paper napkins, notebooks, shopping bags, and a scarf on an armchair. Apparently, she has a coat rack at the front door, but it’s so full that all the jackets don’t fit on it. There are four people in her family and each one has too many coats and jackets according to her.

Every house has the right amount of space for the family. (That is, if the number of people is right for the size of the house – a two-bedroom house is not the right size for a family of six.) I often hear things like, “I don’t have enough closets,” “I need to buy another shelf,” or “I wish I had a bigger closet.” Likely the problem is not the space, but that you have more than you need.

Do you remember the big fat computers from back in the day? Do you still have one when you cannot really use it now? Our lifestyle changes, and technology changes. This is a fact. You can still use this old computer for typing a document, but probably that is it. I was fascinated with this colorful, cute-looking apple computer decades ago. It still looks nice, but it does not serve a purpose anymore.

You can always use the same principle with clothing and household items as with technology gadgets. You can recycle or donate things that don’t serve you anymore.

It is simpler than you think. I can coach you how to do it and you will be on your own. You will enjoy the space in your closet, your living room and your brain.

https://www.stufftherapy.co/

07/12/2019

Holiday season!

This means more STUFF coming in your way from all directions, y'all - get ready!
Receiving gifts is a nice thing. Have you got something that you don't know what to do with? You feel guilty to toss it or sell it... so it ends up somewhere in your house but you don't use it or even don't like it that much.

Here are the quick tips about gifts;

Tip 1: (step 1) Literally say 'Thank you' to the item. (step 2) Literally say 'Good bye' to the item. (step 3) toss it or to a thrift store. (translation) It gave you the joy to receive the thought of the gift giver, so you are thankful for that. However, you don't need it, so saying good bye now.

Tip 2: Tell your family/friends what you want in diplomatic and specific way. (Didn't your parents tell you to stand up for yourself when you were little?) If you lose friends over this, probably it was not your true friends.

Tip 3: Create a new tradition.
I don't know what it can be, but think about what you are passionate about in life such as saving animals, helping veterans, protecting forests, supporting some organizations etc. You can create a donation as a gift - make a fun box for people to put money/checks in at the party and create a party with that theme.

Tip 4: Buy or request something that will disappear - flowers, plants, tea, fruits, spices, food, supplements etc.

Tip 5: Request membership or tickets - museum membership, magazine subscription, online course fee, concert tickets, workshop fee, football team registration fee, kids' ballet classes for the year etc.

Tip 6: Family can chip into booking a nice restaurant/hotel or Air b&b mansion to enjoy the "time together" as gifts to each other.

Tip 7: Re-gifting
If you are a giver, give Christmas gifts in the beginning of December. The receiver can re-gift them if they don't want to keep. You should be ok with it as your thought is the gift, not the item.
If you are the receiver, you have the permission to re-gift it(or donate, sell - whatever you want to do with it). Are you worried the gift giver might find out you got rid of it?! Rest assured, the item was yours and you have the right to do whatever you want. It is a great chance to talk about what your value about gifts is or your boundary if the gift giver enjoys getting into your business. If you don't tell where you stand, they will never know, so communicate well. Choose thoughtful words to convey your genuine thoughts, this is not to create arguments.

Tip 8: Ask 'why?' 3 times to yourself.
You got a sweater from your mother-in-law and you don't like it.
'Why am I keeping it?' - Because I don't want her to find out I don't have it anymore.
'Why don't I want her to find out about that?' - Because she might think I don't care about her gift.
'Why do I think she might think that way?' - Because it will create a conflict.
So the core matter about the sweater is the conflict issue.

Tip 9: Be on the same page with your spouse.
If you struggle with your parents buy too many toys for your kids and you are stressed out with all the noise that battery-operated toys make, it's time to get strategies with your spouse. Set clear (very clear) boundaries with them and treat it like business. Talk to your spouse and both need to be on the same page to win this loving war.

Tip 10: Be out of town.
I know someone does this for Thanksgiving & Christmas every year. She travels somewhere.

Please share if you have a good tip or advice for gifts!

14/11/2019

Clear Space - Clear Mind

Hi, I am Manami Workman - the founder & the advisor. I am committed to helping you create a space you can enjoy and thrive in. I offer guidance through a process that will help you take back control of your environment and promotes self-confidence.
By empowering my clients to make small changes with their space, big changes in their lives can happen.

Everything has a solution.