02/11/2026
5 years ago I used to be able to deadlift 300lbs in sets of 10, crush the 9/11 stair challenge with a weighted vest on, and fold myself like a pretzel.
I used to get down on myself thinking about how my body has “failed” me - that I can’t do the things I used to be able to do because of all these surgeries that I can’t seem to fully recover from, despite my biggest efforts. And then every time I seem to fiiinnaaaallyyy get there, “the rug gets pulled again” and I’m forced 10 steps back - can anyone else relate to that feeling?
It honestly wasn’t until this most recent surgery coming up that really caused me to pause and question the mental race I was running underneath it all. The drive to have to push push push to get back to where I was. To prove something to someone… all. the. time. When I found out I had to get yet ANOTHER surgery due to a complication of the first emergency surgery that I had considered “ruined” my life, I was devastated because I was finally back to working out at a 100% after THREE years.
But you know what? What I actually realized was that this was a second chance … to do it right this time around. My karmic lesson. I mean… I teach all about balance and boundaries and putting yourself first in order to be a true useful service to others… and that’s because of everything I had to go through to learn that. But it was time to put everything I’ve learned and been teaching others into action.
So ya… I used to be able to do all those things in a different season of my life - and maybe one day I’ll get back there, because I’d love to be able to. But this season is a season of embracing healing and having grace with a body that has been battered and bruised - and it needs a little bit of extra care… not to be beaten into submission along with the way I used to treat it during workouts.
And I’m excited for the next season too.
What season are YOU in?
